Skip to main content

Take Your Medicine

Take Your Medicine
This Must Hurt

You are hurting.

Once you had a dream about this venture, it kept you up at night and woke you up in the morning. It featured in every prayer from your lips, your divine contract with God. It became your identity; you say, this is what I do, this is who I am.

For a while it seemed feasible, even almost certain. Then the skies started to shit bricks and you started to wonder if the previous progress was just beginners’ luck.
You lose money, tons of money. Maybe you fall into debt. And just when you thought you’ve hit rock bottom and all you needed to do was add another gust of determination, you fall again and realize there is no rock bottom. Gravity is relative and infinite. 

You are down to nada, zilch, nothing in the bank. Your balance is negative and it’s earning interest. You success has always been a determinant of your mood and now it translates directly. You feel like your bank balance and it is beginning to affect your reasoning and sense of self worth.

You steel your self to be stoic. You try to fake it till you can make it but it’s taking too long and it’s starting to show, no matter how you try. Your vision of you as a flailing, drowning person is pathetic and it is so depressing.

It gets worse. As you your bills come due and you have to renegotiate schedules, you perceive people are noticing. They send their subordinates to deal with you, signaling your reduced status in the pecking order. Sometimes you ignore it, often it seems they are pushing you to lash out. Don’t. Save your anger and energy for a more effective response.

Get this straight.  If changes in your bank balances affect your feelings and psyche, if it impacts your beliefs and principles, I'm sad to inform you that you're human after all. You’ve been playing this game all you life, walking with a swagger when all was great. It just so happens that the most popular flavour in the kitchen of life is sweet and sour, usually served as a tasty single dish, but also available in two different concentrated extremes. Take your medicine. 

Let this experience change you for the better. Growth is painful at first, these are teething pains that can birth a better you. Don’t let the it be in vain. And the hardest one..... try not to make it mean anything about you as a person or that you are a failure. You are not. 

You have failed does not make you a failure. You lost an investment does not make you a loser. You are not your bank balance. The people you meet everyday are not the jobs they do. A human being is more than the sum of her job description, no matter how well written. Learn to treat people with respect; it will make you feel better about yourself.

You just happen to be a person, as legitimate, smart, and good as anyone else, maybe with zero dollars.  But regardless of the setback you have faced, you still have the license to start again.  They can’t cancel you, don’t cancel yourself. 

And that's all there is to this. 



Popular posts from this blog

What Will You Do With A Million Naira?

" Make It Rain ". Photo Credit : Scooter Lowrimore A million is not what it used to be but it is still no chopping change. For those who think is USD, that is about $2500 at the MasterCard Forex rate. There are lots of traders in Lagos markets , keeping a family and sending their kids to university with less than that as working capital. Add a lot of hustle, some advance payment from buyers, a little credit from suppliers and it all adds up. As a wise UK philosopher called Tesco once said, every little helps. 

Happy Is A Verb

  Happy  One of the greatest discoveries by psychologists in the last century is that we humans are able to affect how we feel about anything, independent of our circumstances. To cite an extreme example, someone sick and dying can find reasons for joy in diminished circumstances while another, a wealthy and favoured person could live out their days in despondency. Without trying to undercut the seriousness of the medically diagnosed illness called depression, their is a lot each of us is able to do about feeling happy in our minds, being happy with ourselves . I admit it is usually easier to be happy with a chunk of juicy BBQ in my mouth. Your preference might be a glass of wine. A lot of elderly women like to fuss around with their grandchildren, it gives them a reason for living. We all have things we associate with wellness and just having those symbols around would make us feel better. Many of us were lucky as children to have parents who did things to make us happy. Sometim

See The World As It Is

Beware of Dogma One of the major challenges of living is being able to see the world exactly as it is. Too often, we see what is projected. Let's do an experiment. What is the colour of your skin? What ever is your shade or tint of the human pigment, it certainly is not white or black. Yet mainstream media persists in pushing the prevalent ideology of this non existent absolute skin pigments just as it pushes other extremes of good and bad, faithful and infidel, friend and foe, us against the others, what matters and what does not matter.